Insomnia = Illamasqua ltd ed rubber nailpolish review (bad manicure pics within!)

Hey ladies!!! (dingdingdingdingdingdingding!)

I can't sleep, and as well as having 'Hey Ladies!' by the Beastie Boys in my head (so good when the bass synth kicks in!),  I have decided to ward of the night time frustrations by posting my new nail polish joys. As mentioned before, I am TERRIBLE at doing my nails, I rip them off when they get too long, and I don't clean up mistakes. The reason for this is I don't really care, I just don't, it's a bonus i'm not still filling in my nails with permanent market and tippex, so frankly, y'know, whatever.

Anyway, I bought myself these beauties.

Illamasqua rubber finish nail polish in Prosperity

Illamasqua rubber finish nail polish in Nurture

I don't really go for traditional nail polish finish unless it's a silly colour, and I had a BIG love for the matt finish trend that happened a couple of years back. Rubber finish is just the next step up to AMAZE though frankly! The only downside with this stuff is you need at least three coats, otherwise there is a slight hint of opacity that you don't really want. Also, obviously you can't do a top coat, so you may be chipping by day two or three. It's pretty darn hardwearing though, and the colours are to DIE for. I couldn't afford more than two, but I would really love to get my hands on this colour too...

Illamasqua rubber finish nail polish in Serenity (bright turquoise)

Anyway, have a look at my badly done manicure below and enjoy the rubbery joys of this nailpolish.

My hand, ten minutes ago. Click to enlarge my bad photo.

I purchased this polish from the trusty Illamasqua website for £13.50 each. Click here to go to there.

Do you want to see a shit manacure??

If that's what you're looking for, I am the woman to show you just that. I am a woman in her early mid thirties (yep, i'm at that age when I want to specify exactly where I am in that decade of my life) and I have never, ever EVER had a manicure, and pedicure, to me, is the most insane waste of money I could think of. When it comes to manicures, basically, I rip my nails off once they start annoying me when i'm dj'ing. Have a look at my dry handed (I mentioned I have OCD didn't I? I'm a handwasher par excellence) , unpainted nails below.

My nails, yesterday, looking rubbish.

So as I said the other day, I found via MUA in Superdrug these FUR EFFECT NAILS that give the texture of a syvanian family doll, or that lovely bit on the front of a cats nose. Sign me up for that! So yes, I bought them all, and they conveniently didn't arrive till after NYE, when they were released in the shops anyway, but I paid postage for that convenience. Whoop. Anyway, I painted my nails with various colours of nail polish from MeMeMe (Carefree), Revlon (Cherries in the Snow) and Barry M (np306),  and then applied MUA furry nails in Fluffy Bobbin and Boo Boo Fluff on one hand....

Yep, it's not a great job, but look at the vivid and the furry!

And the other hand was Fuzzy Fluff and Boo Boo Fluff.....

This hand is probably a bit better.

So, yes, there's my messy crappily done manicure. I told you i'm rubbish at being a girl. However, this stuff looks cool. As I said, I don't tend to buy into the whole culture of manicured perfect nails, I have too much shit to do to mess about spending money on have claws, not that I deny anyone the right to have them. If I accidentally scratched a record or accidentally paused one due to having long talons I'd feel like a total gimp, so I choose not to. 

Here's the downside of the cool nails though, the furry ones that is. They are a two day thing at most. They do get a bit mucky, and they wear thin quite quickly, and obviously you can't put a topcoat on because it'd look like misery. 

All in all tho, this stuff is great. It's vivid colour wise, and looks like a toy squirrel. 

Sylvanian family texture nails FTW!!

Okay, I will admit it, I fail as a woman on many many levels. I am not girly, although I am told by my nearest and dearest I am because I 'like make up', I don't think that qualifies me as a proper girl. I have never waxed my legs, I wouldn't know where to start (obvs I shave though, i'm not a hippy), the first time I got anything done regarding beauty that wasn't me was getting my brows threaded in the thoroughfare of my local shopping center two years ago for a fiver, I never have had a bath with candles, the idea of it bores me, and how on earth do people not get insanely BORED!? I don't get the concept of fake tan, and hair extensions seem like fraud to my mind.....so yes, as I say, i'm not your average girly girl.

So what was this preamble about. Well, nails, I don't really do nails. The only time i'm proud of my nails is if they look like they'd be at home in Tron, the below 1982 version I mean.

Anyway, when I do pain my nails they're holographic, or clashing and matte with Nike ticks or some other bollocks shoved on to stop them looking girly. So when I saw the opportunity to own the below, I got rather excited. Ladies and whoever, I present furry nails!

MUA fur effect nails 

It's a pretty simple concept. It's a strongly coloured fur substance, and you paint your nail in a corresponding colour, then press the nail into the fur, wait thirty seconds, brush off the excess and you are left with something like the below. 

MUA fur effect nails in Boo Boo Fluff. 

They are available in five shades, Fluffy Bobbin (Purple), Fluff and Cuddles (Magenta/Red), Fluffy Puff (Baby Pink) and Fuzzy Fluff (Pink) as well as the already pictured shade above. Apparently the effect lasts from 2-3 days in total, because of the nature of the material, they do actually attract dirt and fluff, which sounds a little rank, but I myself would happily put up with it to have those furry friends for a night out. 

They will be available in Superdrug stores around the country from January 3rd, but are online HERE NOW for a bargainous £3.00 each. I myself have ordered three, and I cannot wait to try them!!